Brenda fiddled with her waterglass as she watched Sonny order the hotel staff to clear the dishes from the table and serve the dessert. She ran her hands nervously down the sides of her red charmeuse gown one more time, smiling up at him when the waiters suddenly disappeared.

"You OK, babe?" he asked worriedly.

"Fine!" she blurted out. {I just want to leave here! If I have to stay here with you in this stifling hotel room any longer, I’m going to have déjà vu with my supper all over the fine linen table cloth!} She tried her best to smile. "Supper was wonderful."

Sonny smiled at her and cocked his head to the side. "Well, since we never got to have that reunion on that private island, I thought this might be the next best thing." A waiter leaned down to whisper something in Sonny’s ear, and he sighed in exasperation. "I’m sorry, babe, but I’ve got a quick phone call to answer. Will you excuse me?"

"Sure." Brenda was secretly happy for the reprieve. She had been putting Sonny off ever since they returned from Igua. Luckily, he had business problems that had taken up the better part of a week, so she hadn’t had to endure his presence and had been fairly happy. As happy as she could be when she was throwing up every morning. She had contacted an OB-GYN as soon as she returned to LA, and Dr. Meadows had confirmed that she was, indeed, expecting a child. When she complained that she was nauseous all the time, Dr. Meadows explained that it varied from pregnancy to pregnancy, and if it interfered with maintaining and gaining weight, she would try to prescribe something for it. But so far, it showed no sign of abating.

But soon, Sonny’s business problems were solved and he was back in LA, anxious to get back together with her. She had come up with a number of creative solutions – she needed time to adjust to being back in civilization; she needed time to catch up on her sleep and the change in time zones; she needed time to catch up on all of her own business problems that had been allowed to slide during her absence. But Sonny had become adamant, and so she had finally agreed (reluctantly) to this romantic dinner. When she had arrived at the penthouse suite, she was greeted by waiters in tuxedos, and Sonny himself was wearing a tux when he greeted her with a beautiful corsage.

Dinner had been superb, but it may as well have been shoe leather for as much as Brenda tasted. She knew that at the end of dinner, Sonny probably expected her for dessert, and she just couldn’t bear the thought of him touching her. So, she had decided that afternoon that when they finished dinner, she would break it off. She would tell him that she couldn’t see him anymore. And although that calmed her a little, she still hated the prospect of telling him. Sonny hated surprises.

When he returned to the table, Sonny had to be careful to mask his feelings. His business had been in an uproar ever since they returned from Igua. The missing heroin had still not been located, and he couldn’t very well ask Brenda if they had noticed a suitcase full of illegal drugs that belonged to him in the plane wreckage. He had always protested to Brenda that he hated drugs – that the income from drug trafficking didn’t justify the danger involved. How could he ask her about missing heroin if he was supposed to be so dead set against it?

On the way back to the table, Sonny stopped for a moment to flip a switch in a console. Soft music filled the penthouse, and as Brenda smiled, Sonny held out his arms to her. "Dance with me?"

Brenda inhaled sharply. {Do I tell him before we dance? If I start dancing with him, will I have to arm-wrestle him to let go so I can break it off?} She decided it would tip her hand to outright refuse to dance with the man, so she nodded and rose from the table, her full gown swaying as she walked towards him. Her body hadn’t really started to show any of the signs of her pregnancy yet, although her breasts were beginning to plump up and become uncomfortable. She moved into his arms, and for a while, it felt good just to sway gently to the music.

"I’ve missed you, Brenda," Sonny whispered in her ear, nibbling just below it and making her cringe. He pulled her closer, and she wasn’t so sure that this dancing thing was such a good idea after all. To her surprise, he pulled back from her and looked into her eyes. "Come over and sit down for a minute. I want to talk to you."

{What’s he up to? What’s this about? Maybe he’s going to break up with me and save me the trouble!!!} Sonny led Brenda to a low couch in front of the crackling fireplace and sat next to her, holding her hands in his lap. He looked down, and then up at her dramatically. "I want to apologize to you, Brenda."

"Apologize? For what?" {This is REALLY weird! What is he doing?}

"For the way I’ve been treating you the past year. I know it was hard for you, having to handle Julia’s death all alone. I know I wasn’t there for you, and although you haven’t said anything, I know you must hate me for refusing to come out here when she got so bad."

Brenda didn’t answer him, but finally nodded silently. {So far, so good. You’re right – I hate your guts for that.}

"And then you had the whole experience of the plane crash. It must have been h*ll for you, babe, and then as soon as you’re rescued, I had to leave you again for business." He shook his head and tried to look guilty and humble. "You’re a real diamond, and I’ve been treating you like a lump of coal."

{You won’t get an argument from me. You’ve been a real horse’s @ss.}

Brenda’s eyes widened as Sonny reached into his pocket and pulled out a ring. "I want to make it up to you, babe." He looked down at the ring. "This diamond isn’t worth nearly as much as you are, but I hope you’ll take it anyway and agree to marry me."

Brenda’s hands flew to cover her mouth and tears began to form in her eyes. {Marry you!!? I can’t stand to have you touch me!! Why did you have to pick tonight of all nights to ask me to marry you??} Sonny saw the tears and mistook them for tears of happiness. He pulled her to him and hugged her. "Oh, babe, I know you’re happy. You don’t even have to tell me your answer in words. I can see it in your eyes." He pulled back from the hug and looked deeply into her eyes, cupping her face in his hands and pulling it towards his lips. As soon as he touched his lips to hers, Brenda’s began to tremble in revulsion and she jumped up from the couch.

"Sonny, NO! I can’t do this!" Brenda walked over towards the table, wringing her hands. She finally turned back to him. "There’s something I have to tell you."

Sonny looked down with disgust and then rose from the couch, coming over to where Brenda stood. His mouth was a grim line. "If you’re going to tell me that you slept with that Australian pilot on the island, don’t bother. I already know that."

Brenda frowned. "You do? But how…..when….."

Sonny cocked his head to the side. "I just kind of figured it would have happened. I mean, the guy’s young, and some women would probably think he’s not bad looking, for a blonde guy. Probably keeps in shape." He went to the sideboard and poured himself a brandy. "H*ll, I guess in some ways I should be thankful to him since he probably saved your life, being able to fish and build a hut like that." He took a drink of the brandy, and then turned to face her with cold eyes. "But although I know about it, it doesn’t mean I like it. He touched my woman, and nobody does that and lives to tell about it." He took a deep breath. "After thinkin’ about it, though, I decided to just try to forget about it this time, bein’s he saved your life and all." He took another sip of brandy. "Just don’t remind me about it, OK?"

{Well, you’re not going to be too tickled at this news flash either, Einstein.} "That’s not what I was going to say, Sonny. I was going to tell you that I can’t marry you." Sonny’s face paled, but Brenda decided to go all the way. "I’m breaking it off, Sonny. I don’t want to see you anymore." Brenda realized her knees were trembling, and she slowly sank into one of the chairs at the table.

Sonny walked to sit opposite her at the table. "It’s because of that guy from the island, right?"

Brenda nodded with tears in her eyes. "Jax – his name is Jax." She looked down but then back up into Sonny’s icy stare. "I love him, Sonny." She paused. "I’m carrying his child."

Sonny inhaled as though someone had punched him in the gut. "You’re pregnant?" Brenda nodded. Sonny rubbed his chin and then looked back at Brenda. "But he’s married. He can’t marry you." He put out a hand. "I want you to know that I’ll still marry you, Brenda. I’ll give the kid a father. H*ll, I’ll even try to love it."

Sonny was cringing on the inside, but he had to make the effort not to lose Brenda. He didn’t really love her that much, and it hurt him badly that she didn’t want him. Having to be married to her while she carried another man’s child would be a real blow to his ego. But she was his pipeline for the heroin. It was too easy of a set-up, using her modeling jobs to bring the drugs into the country. It would probably take him a year to set up a well-oiled operation like that again.

Brenda was seriously beginning to think her supper was going to come back up again. "You’d TRY to love it? What kind of sick b*stard are you? No father at all would be better than a father like you!"

Sonny’s temper flared. "And you think your blonde Aussie is going to be a father to it? He’s married, Brenda, and he doesn’t appear to be changing that fact." He rose from the table and began pacing. "He’s been in all the papers for years, Brenda. He’s had affairs all over the world." He stared at her again, anger in his eyes. "You’re just another fling to him. He won’t divorce his wife for you, even if you ARE pregnant."

"He doesn’t know yet," Brenda said in a quiet voice. She raised her eyes to meet his. "I haven’t told him."

Sonny moved to the table to sit and reach out for her hands. "Brenda….I don’t know how to say this….but if you want, I could set it up so you could have an abor….."

Brenda’s head shot up and her eyes now blazed at him. "Don’t even SUGGEST such a thing!" She cupped her stomach protectively. "This is a CHILD, Sonny, and I won’t kill it!" She rose from the table and looked around. "Look, I’m really tired. Maybe tomorrow you’ll see that I’m right and it’s best for us to just break it off cleanly." She stared into his eyes. "I just don’t love you, Sonny. Not the way you deserve to be loved. Not the way someone SHOULD be loved."

"And he showed you that – how someone SHOULD be loved?" Sonny said snidely.

Brenda picked her purse up off the sideboard and went to the door of the penthouse. As she opened the door, she turned back to him. "He showed me everything, Sonny. How to live -- how to love – how to trust. I hope someday you find someone who shows you those things." She turned silently and went through the door, closing it behind her.

Sonny sat in the chair for a few minutes, but then picked up his brandy snifter and hurled it at the fireplace. "Maybe he showed you how to live, babe," he sneered, "but I sure hope he knows how to DIE."

Jerry laughed lewdly as he and Jax strolled down the hallway towards Jax’s office. "No, Jax, see – the difference is, it stays DARK all night!"

Jax shook his head and his eyes crinkled in laughter as he punched Jerry in the shoulder. "Speak for yourself, Jer!" They both sobered, however, as they approached an intimidating-looking woman seated at a desk outside Jax’s office. "Any messages, Addie?"

Jerry was dressed in his usual J&J Charters polo shirt with chino pants, but Jax had on navy gabardine trousers, a white shirt open at the collar with no tie, and a navy blazer, with a J&J logo embroidered on the pocket in white. The woman handed Jax several pink sheets of paper and he glanced through them quickly and frowned.

Addie beat him to the punch. "Nothing from Miss Barrett, sir."

Jax grimaced and then motioned for Jerry to follow him into the office. As he was closing the door behind them, Jax said, "We don’t want to be disturbed, Addie, unless it’s my 2 o’clock appointment – or Miss Barrett."

"I understand, sir," she smiled in return, and Jax closed the doors.

Jerry had settled into a chair in front of Jax’s desk and sat with his hands folded in his lap. "Still no word from her, huh?"

Jax shook his head and sat down heavily in his desk chair. "Nope." He rubbed his temples with his fingers. "Of course, the fact that I had to spend almost a month in Australia after we got back from the island didn’t help things."

"What about since then?"

Jax sighed. "I’ve spoken to her on the phone exactly twice. Once, I called to see how she was doing, and she politely informed me that she was fine but had to go since she had an appointment. Then, Jason went to see her recording studio and she gave him a tour."

Jerry smirked. "I know. He’s been on cloud 9 ever since, floating around the house talking about Ten Inch Screwdrivers and Squished Squash."

Jax shook his head and laughed. "I know. Mum just about had a fit when he started playing some of the CD’s Brenda gave him." He leaned back in the chair. "So, I called her again, to thank her for her generosity."

"And?"

"And….she asked me how everyone was, including my WIFE. Then she asked me if Miranda was STILL my wife." Jax sighed. "Of course, I had to say yes. So, she pleasantly told me to wish her well and said she had another incoming call." Jerry pursed his lips and shook his head. "I’ve sent her flowers and called her since then, but she just returns the flowers and won’t take my calls."

"I wonder why," Jerry returned sarcastically.

Jax frowned at him. "You’re a lot of help." He searched for a file on his desk. "The report from the Devane says that she hasn’t seen Corinthos in weeks. Has Lois said anything about it?"

Jerry shrugged his shoulders. "Not much." Jerry perked up in the chair. "Although she did say that Brenda’s been refusing Sonny’s calls, too." He frowned. "I probably shouldn’t tell you this."

"SPILL, JERRY!"

"Well, Lois says that over a month ago, Corinthos had Brenda over for a romantic dinner and proposed to her." He watched Jax’s fingers clench the file tightly. "Now, don’t go getting all upset. Apparently, Brenda turned him down flat and that was the clincher – she hasn’t seen him since." He leaned back and patted the upholstered arms of the chair. "Lois is tickled pink that Brenda broke up with him. She didn’t like him from the start. She said he gave her the creeps."

Jax’s face was grim. "Yeah, well, I think Lois probably has good instincts." He picked up a piece of paper from the file. "The report from Devane also says that there’s been a car parked outside Brenda and Lois’s condo for the past 3 weeks. Says it follows Brenda everywhere." He looked up at Jerry. "Has Lois said anything about that?"

"Not a word." He leaned forward. "Do you think it’s Corinthos? He’s probably not too happy if she broke it off with him."

Jax nodded. "Particularly if she was his pipeline for the illegal drugs coming into the country." The intercom on the desk rang, and Jax answered it. "Thanks, Addie." He looked back at Jerry grimly. "That’s my 2 o’clock. You’d better think of a way to discreetly warn Lois that Sonny might be watching them."

"Do you think he would hurt them? Maybe we should have some kind of security assigned," Jerry said with a worried frown.

"I’m on it already." Jax moved some papers around. "Right after my appointment today, I’ve got some meetings with the Lear people, and then with a security firm Devane suggested. But first thing tomorrow morning, I’m going to see Miss Barrett in person. She can refuse to take my calls, but she can’t do much to stop me from breaking down her office door."

A woman’s voice echoed from the back of the office. "Ahh, that’s my Jax – master of the subtle art of negotiation." Miranda walked to stand in front of Jax’s desk, her hips undulating beneath the bright purple suit she wore like a second skin.

"Good afternoon, Randy!" Jerry said brightly. "Or should I call you Barney?" He looked her up and down. "Great color on you. Reminds me of a giant, overripe eggplant." He smiled at her snort of indignation and saluted at Jax as he began to leave. "Good luck with your appointments."

After Jerry had left the office, Jax held out a hand towards one of the chairs, indicating that Miranda should take a seat. After she did, he sat in his own chair and pulled a file from his side drawer. "Alexis Davis tells me you’ve refused my latest offer of settlement terms."

Miranda settled into the chair and began slowly pulling off the purple lace gloves she wore. "Yes, well, that’s because I happen to think that our differences are NOT irreconcilable." She smiled into his scowling face. "You’re just being difficult, that’s all."

"Oh, my dear, you haven’t seen anything yet if you think this is difficult!" Jax said in an acid tone, and it stopped Miranda mid-glove removal. "You see, Ms. Davis is an excellent attorney and she’s given me a whole new approach for this situation." Jax folded his hands on the desk on top of the file. "Although you foolishly rejected it, my last offer for settlement terms still stands if you sign the divorce papers immediately."

"Or else….." Miranda let the statement hang and began to remove the other glove.

Jax took a deep breath. "Or else, I file for an annulment." Miranda looked up and her face grew pale. "Ahh, I see I have your attention now! See, the way Alexis explained it to me, marriage can be likened to a business relationship. Both sides need to enter in with full disclosure and honesty. Now, since you hid the little fact from me that the child you were carrying wasn’t mine, you misrepresented yourself, and I can get the marriage annulled."

"THAT’S ABSURD!" Miranda exploded. "We’ve been married for 15 years, for God’s sake! An annulment would be like saying that the marriage never existed! You can’t just wipe away 15 years! You’ll never get it!"

"No, my dear," Jax continued with a calm smile. "YOU wouldn’t get it – money, that is. Because if the marriage is annulled, you’ll end up without a single dime." He opened the file and glanced at one of the papers. "Oh, and I have it on good authority from Alexis that this is definitely legal, and I WILL get it."

"You’ll be saying that Jason is a bastard!"

"If my memory serves, not that long ago you were threatening to expose that very fact. What makes it so loathsome now?" He leaned back in his desk chair. "After all, Jason is much older. He’s learned to deal with all kinds of peer pressures. I think he can handle it."

"He’ll hate you for it," Miranda sneered. "He’ll hate you for lying to him and hiding it for all of these years." She sat back in her chair, plucking at a thread on her gloves. "And of course, I’ll just tell him the truth – that I wanted to tell him years ago, but you wouldn’t let me." She raised her eyes to meet his. "Besides, I’ll sue for sole custody, and once you publicly disown Jason, he’ll never want to see you again anyway. He’ll be glad to agree to live with me for the rest of his life." She saw Jax’s face pale, and she knew she had struck a nerve.

Although Jax was playing it cool on the outside, he was shaking inwardly. He had hated the idea when Alexis suggested it, fearing the very thing that Miranda had just mentioned. He had balked at the idea, but Alexis finally convinced him to threaten Miranda with the notion, hoping that her greed would lead her to agree to the divorce.

But it didn’t appear to be working. "You’re bluffing, Jax," she said coldly. "You won’t risk losing Jason like that, and you could even end up losing J&J Charters."

"You can’t touch the business," Jax replied in an equally frosty tone. "Now you’re the one who’s bluffing, and you know it."

Miranda smiled. "Maybe I won’t end up getting a dime out of it, but I can tie things up in court for a LONG time. There will have to be a legal ruling that I can’t touch the business, and I can drag my feet and keep the business in limbo just as LONG as I want. You know, sometimes my schedule is just SO hectic, and it’s SO hard to make those court hearings….."

Miranda rose from her chair and started towards the door, but then she turned back to Jax. "By the way, how’s little Miss Tropical Tan doing these days? I happened to see a floral arrangement out on Addie’s desk – seems the card was stamped "return to sender." Are things a little rocky between the two of you?"

"I haven’t seen Brenda since we’ve been back from the island, Miranda," Jax replied tersely.

"Oh, NOW I understand," Miranda said, tapping her finger against her chin. "She won’t see you and is returning your floral expressions of desire because she’s still just your MISTRESS and not your WIFE." Miranda smirked. "My, my…..no wonder you took such a chance, bluffing like that with the annulment talk. Poor Jax hasn’t had any for a long time, and in the meantime, she’s probably giving that mobster the ride of his….."

"GET OUT, MIRANDA!" She jumped at Jax’s shout, but then regained her composure and her laugh echoed through the hallway long after she was gone. Jax put his fingers to the bridge of his nose. He barely heard Addie come into the office.

"Can I get you anything, Mr. Jax?"

Jax looked up at Addie with blood-shot eyes. "Yeah, Addie. A miracle."

"Lois! Where’s the file with those new contracts for Brittany Spears? I can’t find them anywhere!" Brenda rooted through the papers stacked on her desk and then sat up straight, putting her hand to her chest and rubbing gently. {Well, Jasper, Jr., at least you’re not making me throw up EVERY morning anymore. Now, you’re just happy doing the indigestion thing.}

She sat back in her chair and took a deep breath, massaging her middle chest slowly to get some relief. She closed her eyes and the memories began flooding back – Jax making love to her on the island; the way the color of his eyes matched the color of the ocean waves first thing in the morning; sharing dinners together, feeding each other, and the delicious lovemaking that always followed; the sound of his voice. She spun around in her chair to face the windows and tried to get that sound out of her head. She had almost jumped for joy, the first time she head it on the telephone, and she had to restrain herself not to grab the phone every time he called after that. She was tempted to just put aside her pride and admit that she loved him and would take him any way she could get him. But then, the image of Miranda would pop up in her brain, and she got the strength to just sit and listen while he left messages that grew more and more angry in tone.

Then the flowers had begun arriving – large, extravagant bouquets of hothouse flowers that renewed the image of the island in her mind.

Ti amo dove sei andato, amore mio, amore mio

Brenda was startled from her reverie when Lois knocked gently on the door. "Brenda, are you OK?"

She spun back around and blinked her eyes rapidly to hold back the tears. "Yeah, I’m fine – or I will be, just as soon as I find those contracts for Brittany. Have you seen them?"

Lois walked in, carrying another large floral arrangement, and Brenda’s heart sank. "I thought you gave those contracts to Robin to type," Lois said as she set the vase down on the desk. "These just came for you."

Brenda grimaced. "You’re right – I did give that file to Robin." She looked back down at her desk, not even checking the card. "You know what to do with those."

Lois sat down in one of the chairs in front of Brenda’s desk. "How long are you gonna keep ignorin’ the man, Bren? He obviously loves you."

Brenda sighed and put her pen down deliberately on the papers in front of her. "He loves me enough to keep tying up my answering machine and making florists rich, but not enough to divorce his WIFE, Lois. How much is that?"

Lois looked down, toying with an imaginary thread on her skirt. "Maybe you should talk to him about it. Maybe there’s a good reason why he can’t divorce the wicked witch of the west."

Brenda’s eyes narrowed. "Is there something you’re not telling me, Lo? Did Jerry tell you something about why Jax can’t divorce Miranda?"

"Not really." Lois looked deeply into Brenda’s eyes. "He just says that the situation is very complicated and it’s Jax’s place to explain it to you." She leaned forward when Brenda shook her head and picked up her pen again. "But both he and I can see how much the man loves you, Brenda. Why don’t you give him a chance? At least TALK to the man…..I mean, how can he explain it to you if you never speak to him for more than 30 seconds at a time?"

As Brenda took a breath to answer her, there was a gentle knock at the office door. Robin, the secretary, stuck her head inside. "Excuse me, Ms. Barrett, but there’s a very insistent gentleman here to see you."

Lois sat up straighter and began fluttering her hands. "Maybe that’s him! Don’t be an idiot and send him away, Brenda! Give the man a chance!"

Brenda’s heart was stuck in her throat. She was hoping with all of her being that it WAS Jax, and that he would come through her door and make it all clear to her. But as she nodded and Robin stepped aside, a short man in a tweed coat and felt fedora came through. He walked briskly to her desk.

"Ms. Brenda Barrett?"

"That’s me."

"Then this is for you." He placed a letter-sized brown manila envelope in her hand and then spun around. As he was about to leave, Brenda tried to stop him, but he just kept on going. Lois watched him while Brenda opened the envelope and when she turned back to Brenda, she gasped.

"Brenda! You’re white as a ghost! What is it?"

Brenda’s hands were shaking. "Have Robin get Scott Baldwin on the phone for me right away." Her voice was grim and she lowered the paper to the desk. "This is a subpoena. I have to appear in Sydney three days from now. It seems that the Aussie police have located a baggage clerk who remembers me bringing a large metal briefcase aboard the jet with me."

To be continued…..

Music credit: "Ti Amo," Composed by Gina G/P. Barry/M. Taylor, from the CD "Fresh" by Gina G.