Early morning, she wakes up

Brenda paused outside Lissie’s room when she heard the music. Her hand was raised in a fist to pound on the door so they could have the little "talk" she had promised the insensitive teen. But this time, the haunting melancholy in the singer’s voice made her listen carefully to the lyrics.

She’s so lucky, she’s a star

Her mouth twisted wryly in thought. This expression of hidden angst was certainly different from the outright defiance in Lissie’s earlier choice of music. Although she didn’t know Jax’s daughter that well yet, it didn’t surprise her to think that beneath the tough teenage veneer lurked a wounded soul. Brenda hesitated for a few seconds and then her chin firmed in determination. Even if Lissie was troubled – and most of her behavior certainly confirmed that fact – it was no excuse for her to have frightened her younger brother the way she did.

She lifted her hand to the door again, paused, and then knocked twice sharply. "Lissie? It’s Brenda."

The music came to an abrupt halt. Forty-five seconds of silence finally gave way to a soft creak when Lissie opened the door. The teen’s expression was sullen, her posture still mutinous as she propped one hand on her hip and rested the other hip against the doorjamb. "I guess this is the part where you condemn me to bread and water for the next two weeks, huh?"

Brenda took a deep breath and then smiled sweetly despite the hostile overture. "May I come in?"

Lissie eyed her warily and then stepped back, sweeping a hand towards her room. "Whatever floats your boat."

One dark eyebrow rose. "I’ll take that as a yes," Brenda replied smoothly. She entered the room and went towards the elaborate stereo system at the side as Lissie closed the door behind her. "I couldn’t help but hear the music out in the hall," the princess-in-disguise said pleasantly, looking over the titles of some of the CD’s in the storage rack. She ran a finger along the edges of the plastic cases, silently mouthing some of the names of the artists. "You have a large assortment of talent here – very eclectic."

"Yeah, well you sure can call it cr@p a lot fancier than my dad does." Lissie snorted and went to the bed, flopping on it on her back to stare at the ceiling. "He says it’s just a bunch of noise – that they don’t write ‘em like they used to, or something like that."

The teen almost fell off the bed when Brenda came over and shoved her feet aside to make room to sit. "I wasn’t *criticizing* your musical taste, Lissie," she said gently. "Eclectic means……"

"Yeah, well I don’t really *care* what it means, OK?" Lissie interrupted angrily. She sat straight up on the bed, her hands balled into fists. In spite of her rebellious bravado, Brenda thought she saw the hint of tears in the teen’s eyes. "I’m kinda tired, so if you’re gonna give me a lecture about what I said to Scottie dog, let’s get it over with so I can get to bed."

"I see……." Brenda nodded slowly. "You’re tired." Lissie’s chin quivered ever so slightly as Brenda stared down at her lap, where her folded hands rested. "I suppose it *does* take a toll on you – being so deliberately cruel to an innocent child like Scott."

Lissie’s right eye narrowed and her rigid backbone seemed to slump a little. "Is he……." She scrubbed quickly at her eyes when embarrassing tears threatened to well up and spill out. "Is he OK?"

Brenda’s heart lightened considerably. Down deep, Lissie really did *care* for her little brother. That was impossible to hide, no matter how much teen "trash talk" she used to camouflage it. "He is now," she replied. "He’s finally asleep down in the nursery." Then she leaned towards Lissie. "But it took him quite a while before he finally stopped crying. I think he just eventually wore himself out so much he couldn’t help but fall asleep."

Lissie sniffled softly and nodded. Then, Brenda could almost see the coldness come over her face again. "I guess I probably scared Scott, but like I said before – dad’s always yelling at me to tell the truth. So I did."

Brenda thought for a moment and then reached out to take Lissie’s hand. "Lissie, I’m not trying to say that you have to *like* Miss Brent……"

"Good!" Lissie snorted, jerking her hand away. "Cause that’s pretty much a "not-in-this-lifetime" kinda thing, if you know what I mean!"

"…….but you shouldn’t make up outrageous stories about what might happen to you and Scott if your father marries her!" Brenda tipped her head to the side, one side of her mouth rising in censure. "No matter *how* awful Miss Brent is, I think we both know she would NEVER do anything to harm you or Scott," she added quietly.

"Yeah…….." Lissie’s lips thinned in defeat. "I know." She sighed loudly. "But how was I supposed to know that Scottie dog watched the Snow White movie?" When she lifted her hands, Brenda knew the teen realized down deep that her defense was as flawed as Swiss cheese. "I mean, I thought all he ever watched was "101 Dalmatians" and "Lady and the Tramp!""

"Lissie……." Brenda’s admonishing tone made Lissie hang her head again. She paused a few seconds, then put a hand gently on the teen’s arm. "And I really think that you’re probably being overly dramatic, thinking that Miss Brent would send you and Scott off to boarding school."

"Ohhhhh, no……..I’m right on the money there," Lissie insisted. "After all – we’re nothing to her. We’re not really *her* kids. We’re just a reminder of the "first" Mrs. Jacks." She shook her head and shrugged her shoulders. "I mean, think about it – nobody in their right mind wants to be a mom to somebody *else’s* kids."

A knife of anguish suddenly pierced Brenda’s heart. Although all of the investigations into Albert’s disappearance had turned up no information, King Harlan and Queen Veronica had been reassured time and again that the boy probably hadn’t been killed. Most likely, he was abducted and sold in some kind of adoption "black market" to a desperate couple somewhere else in the world. But if Lissie was right, did Albert’s adoptive parents look down on her brother as he grew older, and ship him off somewhere to boarding school – alone?

"Now, Lissie……" Brenda suddenly shook off the disturbing mental image and became brusque and businesslike. "You KNOW that’s not true. Look at all the children who are adopted and grow up to be normal, successful adults and have healthy relationships with their adoptive parents."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah…….." Lissie grimaced and folded her legs Indian-style beneath her on the bed. "You don’t have to read me the propaganda about having a new mom." She snorted softly. "My grandma’s fed me and Scotty that party line so many times we’re both ready to puke."

Brenda’s one eyebrow lifted in surprise. "Your grandma?"

"D*mn straight." She shrank a little when Brenda gave her a scolding look for her use of profanity, but then sighed again. "Grandma Jane’s got her heart *set* on dad marrying old Trashley. The old bag’ll go majorly spaz if he doesn’t."

Even though she wasn’t familiar with the slang, Brenda figured out that Jane Jacks had definite plans for her son’s future. "But it’s your *dad’s* life," she argued gently. "And although I haven’t known him for long, I really don’t think he’d marry someone just because his mother wants him to."

Lissie just continued to stare off into space and shake her head sadly. "Nah…….with Grandma beating the drums and old Trashley rubbing up against dad like some kind of sicko feline in heat, it’s just a matter of time before the two of them march down the aisle and say "I do."" She abruptly looked at Brenda and winced. "I mean, it’s not like I didn’t try to scare her off! It didn’t even phase her when I told her about mom’s ghost!"

Brenda tipped her head forward. "Your mother’s…….ghost?"

"Yeah." Lissie nodded matter-of-factly. "I told Trashley how mom haunts this place and would probably make her life miserable, and it *still* didn’t turn her off!"

Brenda slowly took one of Lissie’s hands in hers. "Lissie, you don’t *really* think that your mother’s ghost is in this house, do you?"

"I don’t know." The teen was suddenly somber. "It’s possible." She leaned closer to Brenda. "Mom died in this house, you know. Right out of the clear blue. And you know what they say about peoples’ spirits who leave their bodies before their time……."

Brenda felt herself floundering in deep water. She knew something about acting the role of the disciplinarian – heaven knows she had been on the receiving end so many times as a girl that she had the patter memorized. But acting as a counselor – helping someone going through the agonies of puberty to cope with something as awful as her mother’s death – this was uncharted territory. Then, an even more horrifying thought occurred to her. What if Lissie had heard the gossip about her father being suspected of killing her mother? It was certainly possible – especially with Lissie mentioning the fact that her mother died unexpectedly.

"She did?" Brenda continued to hold Lissie’s hand, deciding that she would let the teen guide the discussion.

"Yep." A tear glimmered in the corner of Lissie’s eye again. "About three years ago. Scott was just a puppy so he doesn’t remember much about it."

Brenda licked her lips nervously. "Lissie………what do YOU rememb……."

"YOU KNOW, it really doesn’t matter………" Lissie abruptly pulled her hand away from Brenda and rose from the bed, swiping at her eyes to dry them. She stuck her hands in the pockets of her jeans and strolled over to a large poster of some rock group with a semi-obscene name. "Because no matter *what* I’ve told her, Trashley’s not gonna rest until she’s got her hooks in dad and some gazillion dollar sparkler of a ring on her bony old finger." Then the teen turned back and pointed at Brenda, her eyes wide. "Unless………"

"Unless………..what?"

Lissie’s eyes started to sparkle with glee. "Unless you get daddy to marry you instead!!!"

"Ohhhhhhh, LISSIE!!" Brenda shot up off the bed and grabbed for the teen as she began to dance around the room happily. "Now just get that thought right out of your head, young lady! There’s no WAY I would ever……..I mean, your father would *never* ask…….."

"OK – then you don’t have to marry him." Lissie shrugged and grinned with elfin delight. "Just get him to boin……"

"ELIZABETH JANE!!!!!"

"Alright, alright…….." Lissie held out her hands, palms up, trying to calm Brenda. "Don’t have a cow, OK?" She jumped onto the bed, on her knees, bracing her fists next to her legs eagerly. "How about if you seduce my dad?" She raised one dark eyebrow at Brenda. "Did you go out and buy that chartreuse bra yet?"

"No……." Brenda sputtered for a moment but then regained her composure. "And it really doesn’t make any difference! I could buy a purple satin thong with pink polka-dots and your father STILL would never….. I mean, I STILL couldn’t think of him in those……" She growled and clenched her fists in frustration. "I mean, we have a *business* relationship, Lissie, and nothing’s going to change that."

Lissie’s smile became downright devilish. "It could……….if he asked you out on a date." She rubbed her hands together and stared off into space, outlining the scenario aloud. "And I know he kinda already likes you, and the two of you would have so much in common, with us kids to talk about and everything, and then who *knows* where it would lead, and old Trashley would find herself out in the cold cause dad would only want to be with YOU!!"

Brenda felt her cheeks flaming as the room seemed to turn into an inferno. Did Lissie possibly know that, more than once, she had had secret yearnings for Jax to do a lot more than just ask her out?

"Well…….." She turned away from Lissie and tried to fan herself as discreetly as possible. "Well, that’s NOT going to happen." This entire conversation wasn’t going at ALL the way Brenda had planned it. She decided that it was time to do what all good generals do when a strategy falls apart – retreat. She walked to the door of Lissie’s room and opened it with a firm jerk. "And we’re NOT going to discuss it anymore, do you HEAR?"

Lissie sat back on her heels on the bed. The mischievous expression on her face told Brenda that she wasn’t *about* to abandon her newest scheme anytime soon. "Right. We won’t talk about it anymore," she said contritely. She even drooped her head in mock obedience. "I promise."

"Good." It was Brenda’s turn to stifle a sly grin. "And you’re still grounded – for the incident with Scottie."

She was standing in the doorway when Lissie’s spoke softly. "Are you gonna tell my dad what I did?"

Brenda chewed on her lower lip. How many times in her youth had Captain Scorpio covered up some of her minor indiscretions? "I’m not sure. I’ll have to think about it."

She went into the hallway and was pulling the door closed behind her when she heard Lissie’s voice again. "Well, if you *do* decide to tell him – be sure to wear that pink and purple satin thong, OK?"

*~*~*~*

The minute Jax got into the long black limousine, his mother leaned forward, concern etched on her face. "I do hope Ashley will be alright," Jane crooned. "It’s such a shame that she got one of her migraines and had to leave the Crystal Ball so early." A smile briefly teased at the corners of her mouth. "Especially when you and she were having such a *smashing* time."

Jax sighed, his voice oddly harsh. "Oh, I think Ashley will be just *fine*, Mum."

"Do you really, dear?" Even in the dim light in the rear of the car, Jax could see Jane place her bejeweled fingers against the side of her cheek. "Because I’ve heard how awful those kind of headaches can be."

"Well, it must not have been *too* bad," Jax shot back acidly. "At least, not bad enough that it would make her forget to mention that I should pick her up next Tuesday night around seven so we won’t be late for the Civic Dinner!"

Jane sank a little lower in her plush seat, her perfectly-manicured, delicate fingers covering her lips. "Oh, dear…….."

"Yes, OH, DEAR!" Jax growled, moving closer to his mother on the seat. "Did you tell her I would take her to the Civic Dinner??!!"

"Well, you have to take *somebody* dear, and Tuesday is my bridge night……"

"I only have to take somebody if I GO, mother!" Jax snarled. "Which I wasn’t PLANNING to!"

"Oh, but you MUST go, dear," Jane replied emphatically. She seemed to get some of her spark back and began to toy with the clasp on her evening purse. "J&J Jacks is being honored for our contribution to the Youth Center Building Fund, and Roy is slated to receive a special plaque for his work with troubled young people."

"Fine." Jax rapped sharply on the glass as a signal to the driver and then settled back into his seat when the car started to move. "Let Roy go."

"Fine." Jane’s smile was pure feline victory. "You find him, and promise me that he’ll be there. Then *you* don’t have to attend." She shot her son a look that was reminiscent of the one Brenda gave Lissie earlier in the evening. "I *don’t* want the firm to be embarrassed, Jax. Not when we’re being honored so conspicuously."

"D*mn." Jax ruffled his hair with his fingers in frustration and then crossed his arms. "D*mn, d*mn, and double d*mn."

Jane chuckled softly and looked out the passenger side window of the limo, her mood suddenly much brighter. "You know, maybe Roy being "missing in action" isn’t such a bad thing after all." She gave Jax a thin-lipped, "You-should-know-by-now-I’m-always-right" smile. "Particularly if it gives you and Ashley a chance to spend more time together."

"I don’t *want* to spend time with Ashley, mother," Jax hissed. His balled fist was pressed against his lips as he stared out his own window. "I *want* to…….." He pounded his fist on the armrest for emphasis as he turned towards Jane. "……no, I SHOULD be spending more time with my *children*, not with Ashley! Lissie is going through a rough stage in her life with all this teen angst business, and Scotty’s………well, Scott……."

"Fine." Jane’s voice was distinctly chilly. "Spend time with the children during the day." She turned to look out her window again. "And then, in the evening, spend time with Ashley while you take her to the Civic Dinner."

"You know as well as I do that I *can’t* afford to spend as much time as I’d like with the children during the day!"

"Well," Jane snorted haughtily, "you certainly can’t take them to the Civic Dinner with you!"

"No……." Jax’s one eye suddenly narrowed.

"……..and you *have* to take someone……." Jane continued, gesturing grandly in the air towards Jax with her right hand.

"Yes……." A sly smile lifted the corners of Jax’s lips. "But it doesn’t have to be Ashley……."

Understanding caused a stricken look to wash over Jane’s face. "Oh, Lord……..don’t tell me you’re going to *hire* someone to escort for the evening!!"

Jax chuckled softly. "I already *did*, mum," he replied triumphantly.

"Ja-ax…….." Jane drew the name out to two syllables with maternal disapproval. "Whatever *are* you thinking, son?"

He folded his arms across his chest in a way that showed he was obviously quite pleased with himself. "I’ll take Brenda."

"Brenda?" Jane’s eyebrows drew together. "Brenda who?"

"Brenda Barrett." Jax grinned broadly. "The children’s new nanny."

"The children’s new………" Jane’s voice trailed off but then came back with resounding displeasure. "Good heavens, Jax! Are you *seriously* considering showing up at the Civic Dinner – in front of the mayor and the press and most of our friends – with some buxom, white-haired matron who wears orthopedic oxfords and support hose?"

"I *hardly* think that Brenda wears support hose, mum." Jax had to fight the stimulating mental image of the petite brunette nanny clad in something red and sheer – high-cut and low-cut at the same time, in the appropriate places, of course – and connecting to a matching satin garter belt and high heels. "You don’t have to worry – I’m sure she’ll make a fine impression on everyone there."

"But Jax……."

"It’s all settled, mum!" Jax interrupted vehemently. The cleft in his chin deepened with a combination of anger and determination. "I’ll take Brenda to the Civic Dinner and that’s that."

Silence reigned in the back of the limousine for almost two minutes before Jane spoke again coolly. "What if she doesn’t *want* to go with you?"

"She’ll go. In fact, she’d probably get a kick out of being invited to something like that. She might actually *enjoy* rubbing elbows with all of those nose-in-the-air aristocrats you like to call your friends." Jax smiled at his mother victoriously. "Sort of a change of pace, after dealing with Lissie and her defiant teenage angst all day." Then he peered towards the front of the limousine as it slowed in traffic. "Bloody h*ll…….looks like there’s some kind of accident up ahead." He rapped on the glass sharply. "I’m going to tell Withers to just double back and drop me off first," he explained. "Then he can go south and avoid this mess and take you home."

"You almost sound like you’re anxious to be rid of me," Jane pouted. She put a hand gently on Jax’s arm. "You *know* I’m only trying to do what’s best for you dear. I just…….well, I’m afraid that if I don’t push you to get out, you’ll get some wild idea that Miranda would have wanted you to give up living, just because she was gone."

Jax dropped his gaze, but then looked up into his mother’s eyes and patted her hand warmly. "I know, mum. You mean well." He slid back into his seat as the driver turned the large car around and headed back towards the Jacks estate. As he watched the scenery fly by, he couldn’t wait to get home and see if Brenda was still awake – and invite Cinderella to the ball.

*~*~*~*~*

"I’m doing this for Albert. I’m doing this for Albert." Brenda kept repeating the mantra softly as she tip-toed through the darkened house towards Jax’s study.

After seeing Ashley wind herself around the Aussie billionaire like an anaconda, and after hearing Lissie talk about how much Jane Jacks wanted her son to marry the willowy blonde, there was little doubt in Brenda’s mind that he wouldn’t be home early. In fact – considering the clearly seductive dress Ashley had worn to the ball, she decided that her boss probably wouldn’t be back on the premises until breakfast – if then. All of which gave her the perfect opportunity to do some snooping for any information on the mysterious, elusive Roy DeLucca.

On her way back from her "talk" with Lissie, she had peeked into Scott’s room and was pleased to see the little boy sleeping soundly. It didn’t really surprise her – his sister’s remarks had pretty much sent him into an emotional tailspin that produced a long bout of crying. Brenda had comforted him as best she could until he finally slipped into a troubled slumber. But now, he was resting quietly in his bed, hugging one of his stuffed dogs tightly to his chest.

Brenda returned to her own room and paced nervously for over an hour. She kept telling herself that an opportunity like this might not present itself again in the near future. After returning from Singapore that day, Jax had been in such a rush to get ready for the Crystal Ball that he might have left his office unlocked. And with the prospect of him returning and catching her in the act of rifling through his desk quite minimal, the phrase "now-or-never" seemed apropos.

It was close to 11:15 when Brenda finally emerged from her room again. She had donned some comfortable silver satin sleep pants and a crop top, throwing a silk robe over them. If she ran into Lissie unexpectedly in the hall, she could always claim that she was on the way to the kitchen for some warm milk to cure her insomnia.

As she passed Lissie’s room, Brenda held her breath. The thumping of the bass from the teenager’s CD player had ceased. She put her ear to the door and was gratified when it didn’t vibrate against her jaw from the pulsing music. Crouching down to check, the absence of light coming from beneath the door made Brenda pump her fist silently in victory.

The proverbial coast was clear.

Her feet flew as Brenda made her way out of the residence wing of the house and towards Jax’s office. She paused to look over her shoulder once, but then reminded herself that both of the children were fast asleep, and none of the other servants seemed to care about her comings and goings. It didn’t take her long to get to the large oak door that led to Jax’s inner sanctum. She stopped, took a deep breath, then grasped the doorknob firmly and twisted it, gritting her teeth.

It turned, and the door swung open. The office wasn’t locked.

Brenda tiptoed inside and closed the door quickly behind her. The full moon shining through the immense windows of the office allowed her to find her way through the darkened room to Jax’s desk. She sank into the plush leather of his chair, bit on her lower lip, and then reached over to turn on a brass desk lamp that flooded that corner of the room in a pool of light.

The first thing that occurred to her as Brenda surveyed the items on top of the desk was the discovery that Jasper Jacks was *not* a neat freak. Files, pads of paper, and a myriad of colored sticky notes made a small mountain in the very center. Recent mail was stacked in several piles to the right – apparently Addie’s attempt to keep her boss on task – with more sticky notes identifying the respective mounds as "business," "personal," and "junk." On the left, pink message slips were also grouped appropriately – "urgent," "very urgent," and "frothing at the mouth."

Brenda fingered the message slips gingerly. Surely she couldn’t have been lucky enough – that Roy DeLucca would have called that day and left a convenient phone number where he could be reached? After flipping through the messages as deftly as she could so as not to disturb them, she mouthed a soft obscenity. Strike one.

As she glanced back across the desk, Brenda’s eyes widened. She raised her hands, clenched in fists, and wiggled her bottom on the chair in a seated "happy dance." Reaching out tentatively, she pulled Jax’s rolodex closer to her on the desktop. She flipped the small cards towards the back, and then carefully ticked some of them forward until she came to the "D’s." Surely Jax would have his partner’s home address and telephone in his rolodex. It wasn’t like the information was imperative to national security and couldn’t be published. Darkford, Debratio, Dixon, Donatello, Dosh, Duckworth, Duzbell…….Eaton, Eggleston…….

Strike two.

Brenda sighed and slumped back in the desk chair. She folded her hands in her lap and twiddled her thumbs impatiently. {If *you* were Roy DeLucca’s address and phone number, where would *you* hide?} She glanced at the desk drawers on each side of her, chewing on her lip again. Although she had already technically "broken and entered" – even if she hadn’t "broken" anything – there was something about going through Jax’s drawers without him knowing about it that didn’t seem right to her. Her lips lifted in a soft smile. "Well, if Lissie had anything to say about it," she whispered to herself, "she would *love* for me to be fooling around in her father’s drawers!"

When her heart started to race and her face felt flushed, Brenda gave herself a mental shake. She had to get the thought of Jax and his drawers – and whatever wonders of the world they contained – out of her mind and concentrate on Jax’s DRAWERS. His DESK drawers.

She reached out for a side drawer, pulled her hand back, and then gripped it firmly again. Maybe it would be locked. That would save her the decision. Maybe…….but it wasn’t. The drawer slid open on well-oiled bearings to her shocked gasp. Apparently, Jasper Jacks was a man of many surprises. He was somewhat disorganized, probably overworked, behind in his correspondence – and a choc-o-holic. A stack of at least half a dozen Kit Kat bars sat in the desk drawer, along with an assortment of pens and small note pads.

"AHA……………"

Brenda slammed the drawer shut so fast she almost caught her fingers in it. She looked up at the door, her dark curls bouncing around her eyes so badly that she had to push them back to see. And when she *did* see the source of the sound, her heart stopped, caught somewhere in her throat.

Jax lounged casually in the open doorway of the office. He had taken off his tuxedo jacket and hung from his crooked finger over his right shoulder. His formal bow tie was undone, the two sides hanging down to provide a stark contrast against the starched white dress shirt. As he stared at her with a twinkle in his eye and a broad grin on his face, a shock of golden hair fell down across his forehead, giving him a rakish air.

"Mister……uh………Jax!" Brenda stumbled to rise to her feet, her knees knocking so loudly that she was sure Jax must have heard them.

"Don’t bother to try to explain, Miss Barrett," he announced as he walked slowly towards her. She had to fight to keep her gaze from straying southward to where his trousers stretched across his swaying hips. He reminded her of a predatory beast, stalking its innocent prey before pouncing. "The jig’s up."

Brenda’s eyes widened and she almost saw stars as the room started to spin. "Excuse me?"

"I said you don’t have to explain yourself, Brenda," Jax replied calmly. He tossed his jacket onto a side chair in front of the desk and came to stand directly in front of her, bracing his weight with his hands as he leaned towards her. "I KNOW what’s going on."

Strike three. She was out.

To be continued………..

Music credit: "Lucky," sung by Britney Spears on the CD, "Oops, I Did It Again"