"Salud!" Thao lifted his champagne flute high in the air.

"Skol!" Miranda lifted her glass, clinking against Thao’s.

"Bottoms up!" Jax took his turn, gently touching his glass to Miranda and Thao’s.

All eyes turned to Brenda as she lifted her glass. She smiled naughtily, winked at Jax, and then deliberately touched her glass to Miranda’s. "Up……yours!"

Thao burst out laughing as Jax covered his mouth to keep from spraying everyone at their table with champagne. The foursome had gathered at La Veranda in celebration of Jax and Thao finalizing their deal. All that remained were the press releases and the actual signing of the papers to make it a reality. It had been over a week since Jax had presented Brenda with Trouble. Although Brenda resented spending the evening with Miranda, she desperately wanted to spend time with her husband. She had seen very little of Jax during that time, although he did manage to break free for a little while each day to check on Jon and make sure no more threatening phone calls had been received.

"I fail to see what you two find so humorous," Miranda pouted. She crossed her arms and sat back in her chair, only to wince and cover her ears when the band started a new set. "In fact, I can’t imagine why the three of you wanted to come *here* again, of all places!"

"Oh, lighten up, Miranda," Thao muttered, leaning closer to her so that she could hear him. "The band that was playing last time we were here was quite good, and we had no idea that the entertainment had changed."

Brenda giggled. "Yeah – who could have known we’d have to listen to the Bleached Blonde Bimbos!" Jax and Thao collapsed into laughter again, but Miranda continued to pout until Jax waved a hand at the rest of them and stood.

"I’ll go see if I can ask them to tone it down a little and play something slower," he shouted. Brenda was about to offer to come with him, but Jax left before she could say anything. She watched him walk towards the bandstand and had to take a deep breath to try to get her heart to stop racing. There was just something about the sight of her blue-jean-clad husband from behind that made Brenda want to re-enact an X-rated movie she found on cable TV late one night.

When a sudden noise on the other side of the room caused Brenda to turn and look, she caught sight of Miranda’s face. Unfortunately, Miranda was having the same lustful thoughts as Brenda, and she wasn’t even trying to hide it. Brenda’s jaw almost hit the floor when Miranda’s tongue emerged to lick her lips although her eyes were trained on Jax’s posterior. Her dark brown eyes almost looked black with desire for him in the dim light of the bar.

Just as Brenda was thinking of some really choice names to call Miranda, the music stopped abruptly and changed to something slow and quiet. "Wasn’t that sweet of him?" she cooed. Brenda was about to lose her supper when Miranda rose with a smile. "I think I’ll just go ask him to dance to express my……appreciation."

Brenda prayed that the steam coming out of her ears wasn’t visible as Miranda wiggled her way over towards Jax. She watched as Jax smiled at Miranda innocently, nodded his head, and then led her into the middle of the dance floor. But when she glanced over at Thao, Brenda saw something that literally made her jaw drop.

Thao was giving Miranda the same hungry looks that Miranda had given Jax only moments earlier. {He cares for her! Oh, my God……he might actually……love her! The poor guy!} Brenda chewed her lip for a few moments as a number of realizations came to her. A few seconds later, she turned to Thao and smiled brightly. "Would you like to dance with me, Thao?"

"Me?" Thao pointed to his chest in disbelief. Brenda nodded. "With ….you?" He pointed to her. Another nod. "Now?" He pointed at the dance floor and Brenda sighed in exasperation.

"For goodness’ sake, Thao, if you ask any more questions, the song will be over!" Brenda grabbed Thao’s hand and led him to the dance floor, still frowning. She had to bite her tongue as she saw Miranda practically glued to Jax’s body on the opposite side of the room. They had been dancing politely for a few minutes when Brenda pulled back and looked into Thao’s eyes. "I’m onto you, you know."

"You are?" He glanced back at their table warily. "Does this mean I get something dumped over my head again?"

Brenda smiled and blushed a little. "Nope. It means that I need to thank you for caring so much about Jax."

"Ahhh, yes…..I care so much about your husband that I’m willing to make the supreme sacrifice and use him to make millions of dollars." Thao shook his head but continued to smile. "I really don’t understand what you’re talking about, Brenda."

"That little speech you gave me…..about leaving Jax and letting him have a future with a woman who wouldn’t hurt him." Brenda nodded knowingly. "It must have been hard for you – telling me to scram so Jax could have the woman you really care about."

Thao suddenly pulled Brenda closer and turned her in a circle, avoiding looking into her eyes. "You’re talking nonsense, Brenda."

But she forced him to stand still and just sway in time to the music. "No, I’m beginning to see a lot of things *very* clearly now, Thao. You’d probably *love* it if Jax and I reconciled. That would leave Miranda alone and vulnerable, and in a perfect position for you to come along and heal her broken heart." Thao looked away and sighed but Brenda continued. "But you’re such a nice guy down deep and you care about that husband of mine so much that you’ll give up the woman you love just so he can be happy."

Thao looked down at the floor and shrugged his shoulders. "Well……that ……possibly could be true."

"Why didn’t you tell me sooner, Cyrano?" Brenda whispered gently. Thao looked up into her eyes and smiled. "It would have saved you an orange juice bath!"

The music ended abruptly and Brenda and Thao found themselves surrounded by politely applauding customers. "I’m beginning to understand why Jax keeps saying you are so different, Brenda," Thao murmured in her ear. He leaned back and looked warmly into her eyes. "Perhaps I should have been a little more……selfish. I’m beginning to think that a reconciliation with you *would* be best for Jax."

Brenda leaned forward to give Thao a hug and when they broke apart, she turned to find Miranda giving her a critical look. "Well, look who decided to join us on the dance floor," she purred. "And don’t they look cozy?"

Jax inhaled to say something but just then the music started again. Brenda squealed happily. "Mambo 5!" She grabbed Jax’s hand. "Come on, honey – dance with me!"

Jax pulled away from her a little. "Oh, Brenda…..I really don’t know how to do this one….."

"It’s easy! I’ll teach you!" she shouted as the music swelled. Jax kept shaking his head and she turned to give Thao a wink. "I’ll bet Thao would dance with me if you won’t!"

Miranda crossed her arms. "Gee, she may have amnesia, but she sure hasn’t forgotten her old tricks, has she?"

Brenda’s face was blank but she suspected Miranda was up to no good. "What old tricks?"

Before Miranda could answer, Thao grabbed Miranda by the arm and started pulling her back towards their table. "I think you need to sit this one out and drink some black coffee, don’t you, Miranda?"

Miranda was fuming as Jax and Brenda followed Thao and Miranda back to their table. "She knows d*mn well what I mean by old tricks!" Miranda sputtered, pointing at Brenda. "If you can’t be with the one you love, honey, love the one you’re with!" she sang maliciously.

Thao practically shoved Miranda into her chair and sat down beside her as Jax and Brenda stood at the table. "Maybe we should just call it a night now," Jax offered as Miranda continued to glare at Brenda. "I guess the stress of the past few weeks is getting to everyone."

"OH, SURE!" Miranda shouted, although with the band playing loudly, nobody else in the room could have heard her. "Protect her like you always do, Jax! Stick your head in the sand again and don’t admit that little goody-two-shoes here has any faults!"

Jax tried to grab Brenda as she put her hands on her hips and planted herself in front of Miranda. "If you’re going to accuse me of something you think I did, honey, spit it out! Don’t beat around the bush for my sake!"

Miranda managed to escape Thao’s grasp and rose to look Brenda in the eye. "I don’t just THINK you did it, *honey*," she echoed. "I happen to KNOW that when Jax refused to sleep with you, you needed it so bad that you propositioned his best friend!"

Thao swore loudly but fortunately the Bimbos’ playing drowned out his crudity. He dropped into a chair next to Miranda, rubbing his forehead with his fingers in disgust. Brenda covered her mouth with her hands as she felt Jax’s body stiffen next to her. "Jax…." Thao muttered, but Jax put up a hand to stop him.

"You call yourself my best friend," Jax hissed, "and yet you never told me that you slept with my wife?"

Thao slapped the table loudly with his hand and glared at Miranda out of the corner of his eye. "It happened almost two years ago, Jax. You and Brenda had separated briefly, and she got very drunk one night and ….well, she ….." Thao raised pained eyes to meet Brenda’s tearful ones, and then he looked at Jax. "But I turned her down, Jax. Nothing ever happened." He glared at Miranda again. "I never intended for you to find out."

Brenda turned to Jax. "Jax…..you have to believe me……I don’t remember anything….."

Miranda raised her head from the table. "Oh, sure….there she goes again…..that convenient amnesia thing……"

Thao jerked Miranda to her feet. "You’ve said quite enough for this evening, Miranda." He sighed and gave Jax an apologetic look. "I’ll take her home and shove her in a cold shower to sober her up."

Brenda’s shoulders shook as Jax refused to look at her. "Yes, I don’t think any of us are in the mood to celebrate any more this evening." He threw some cash down on their table and then finally turned cold eyes to Brenda. "Let’s get out of here."

Neither one said a word until they got to the car. Jax opened Brenda’s door and made sure she was inside as usual. When he got in, she inhaled to say something but he just held up his hand to silence her. "Don’t say a word, Brenda. My head’s a little fuzzy as it is from the champagne, the sun’s just going down, and I need to concentrate on my driving."

She sniffed back her tears and gave a quick nod as he started the engine. The drive home seemed to take a lifetime, but soon they arrived at the driveway of the Malibu estate. As soon as Jax pulled up in front of the house and shut off the engine, Brenda turned to him. "Jax, please listen to me….." Jax got out of the car, cutting her off again. When Brenda jumped out too, she saw that he was striding quickly towards the walkway to the lanai. She ran after him and caught him by the arm, turning him towards her. "Please don’t freeze me out, Jax! We need to talk about this!"

He pulled his arm from her grasp. "Brenda, right now the only thing I want to do is take a walk on the beach – alone. I’ve got some thinking to do, and I really don’t think there’s anything more that needs to be said." His face was expressionless, and it scared Brenda.

"Jax, please….." Just then, both of them jumped as the sound of Jon’s crying drifted from a bedroom window.

"The baby’s crying. You should go to him." Jax nodded towards the house. Brenda resisted, but then nodded quickly. When she raised tearful eyes to meet Jax’s ice-cold blue ones, they melted ever so slightly. "I’m going for a walk down on the beach. I just need to be alone for a while and try to sort this all out."

Watching Jax walk away from her was one of the hardest things Brenda had ever done. She waited until she saw him close the gate of the lanai and start down the sand. Then, when she heard Jon crying again, she sighed loudly and turned to go back inside the house.

***************

Now there’s no point in placing the blame,

Jax was sitting on a sand dune, tossing broken bits of sea shells into the ocean, when he heard footsteps behind him. "I thought I told you I wanted to be alone," he said softly, not turning around.

"It’s me, Jax," Miranda said softly. Jax sighed but didn’t look up at her. She hiccuped and then dropped to her knees in the sand behind him. "Are you going to hate me for the rest of my life for what I said tonight?"

"Not hate you – never *understand* you, maybe, but not hate you." Jax’s words were terse and he still didn’t turn around.

"Jax, I’m really sorry that I let that slip," Miranda crooned. She fell to her knees behind him and he felt her hands rest on his shoulders. "It’s just that I shouldn’t have drunk that champagne without eating something, you know?" Jax could feel the smile fade from her face as her grip on his shoulders tightened. "And then when you kept laughing at every word that came out of Brenda’s mouth, and acting like she was the brightest, cutest thing you had ever seen……"

"Green really isn’t your color, Miranda." Jax pulled away from her so that her hands dropped to her lap behind him and his voice was cold. "You don’t do jealousy well."

He heard Miranda’s in-drawn breath and then suddenly she got up from behind him. She walked to stand in front of him, and the setting sun made a fiery halo around her anger. Her hair was still damp from a (probably cold) shower and her eyes were puffy from crying. "D*mnit, Jax – I can’t help it!" Jax finally looked up at her and she wasn’t managing to hide any of her fury. "OK – it’s not pretty, but I’ll admit it! I AM jealous of that little b*tch! But I’ve got good reason to be! I love you!"

Jax sighed as he finally rose to his feet. The last thing he was in the mood for was a hysterical tirade. "Miranda, we’ve been through this before, and I told you I don’t feel that way about you….."

She almost knocked him off his feet when Miranda launched herself at Jax’s body. "But you WILL someday, Jax…..because she’s going to hurt you again." She started rubbing her hands up and down his chest and Jax sucked in his breath as he felt his nipples harden involuntarily. He closed his eyes and turned his head away, but Miranda took his face in her hands gently and led his eyes back to meet hers. "I’ll never hurt you, Jax," she purred. She pressed her body against his and the roaring of the surf seemed to reverberate in his head. She stood on tiptoe to bring her lips up to his. "Let me help you….."

Before he could say a word, Miranda slid her hands around his neck and brought his head down to hers. Her lips met his and Jax felt her body pressing against his with desire. The effects of the champagne and the fact that he hadn’t made love to a woman in almost a year conspired to rob Jax of his common sense. Although he knew he was probably making a big mistake, his arms wound around Miranda and his hands slipped down past her waist, pulling her against his rapidly growing arousal.

Miranda broke the kiss but tangled her fingers in Jax’s hair to hold his face against her neck. "Make love to me, Jax," she murmured passionately. "Let yourself go…..you know you’ve been wanting to……"

Jax was breathing hard but somewhere deep inside alarm bells seemed to go off. Miranda felt his body tense and she knew if she didn’t do something, she would lose Jax. So, she forced his face back to hers and pressed her mouth to his, sliding her tongue between his lips.

{This isn’t wrong, man. Brenda did the same thing to you. You have a right to hurt her after the way she’s hurt you.} Jax kept trying to rationalize what was happening, but suddenly he realized something. As warm and soft as Miranda’s body felt, there was something missing. It didn’t feel like it belonged against his – like Brenda’s did. Miranda’s kisses were meant to entice, but they didn’t set his soul on fire – like Brenda’s did. Miranda’s tongue felt like some kind of invasive instrument, not a sensual promise of things to come – like Brenda’s did. When he felt hand slipping between them towards his belt and zipper pull, he gathered all the strength he had and suddenly jerked away from her.

"Jax! What’s the matter!" Miranda ran her hands through her hair but tried to appear seductive and not nearly as frantic as she was. She tried to walk towards him but he only backed away from her.

"No, Miranda…..we can’t do this……" Jax turned and tried to walk back to the house but she caught his arm and spun him back to face her.

"I’m sorry, Jax," she whispered in a husky voice. She ran her hands up his arm. "I should have realized that a man like you wants to be in control when he makes love to a woman."

"It’s not that, Miranda." Jax put more space between them and even in the dying light of day, he could see the anger and hurt on her face. "I just……I don’t WANT you."

Miranda gave him a predatory smile. "Your mind may say no, Jax….." She glanced down at his body. "….but other parts of you are saying YES."

She advanced on him again, but Jax put his hands out to hold her at arm’s length. "No, Miranda. It’s no good." She inhaled to speak but he only shook his head. "D*mnit, Miranda, can’t you just take no for an answer?" He sighed and gave her a sad smile. "I guess not – I guess you’re going to make me say it, aren’t you?" Miranda frowned a little in confusion as Jax continued to hold her at a distance. "Miranda," he said slowly, "the only reason that it looks like I WANT you is because…..I was thinking of Brenda."

Jax could see the breath leave Miranda’s body. "No…..that’s not true…..you want me……"

Jax gripped Miranda’s arms more firmly. "I want HER, Miranda! The only way I’d be able to make love to you is if I would imagine I was making love to Brenda!"

Suddenly, Miranda forcefully wrenched herself from his grasp and staggered backwards. "How can you SAY that?! How can you still WANT her after all she’s done to you?"

"She’s different now, Miranda," Jax pleaded. Then he pulled himself upright. "Besides – I don’t need to justify my feelings to you or anybody else. Brenda is my wife, and I still love her."

Miranda quickly wiped at her eyes and then started trudging back towards her own house. "You’ll change your mind, Jax. *She’ll* change, and when she does, I’ll still be waiting for you."

Jax watched as Miranda walked away from him, her shoulders shaking with sobs. "I’m not so sure she will change, Miranda. Don’t hold your breath."

*********

Love is a bird, she needs to fly,

Brenda went inside the house to take care of Jon, but it took all of her will power to stay calm and smiling while she gave him his bottle. Thankfully, he drank it all quickly, burped on command, and drifted back off to sleep within seconds. She paced in front of the bedroom windows for a few minutes, but then when she couldn’t stand the suspense any longer, Brenda sneaked out the back door of the house and went down to the lanai in search of her husband.

She really hadn’t expected to find him there. He had that look on his face like he wanted to be where there was just him, and open spaces. So Brenda found herself opening the gate from the lanai to the beach. She didn’t have to walk far before she saw him, sitting alone in the sand. His knees were drawn up to his chest and he had his arms wrapped around his legs. She watched for a few moments and had just about gotten her courage up to go confront him when she saw Miranda approach from the side.

Brenda had to cram her knuckle between her lips to keep from screaming at the top of her lungs. She couldn’t believe the nerve that Miranda had – couldn’t she see that he wanted to be alone? His body language was very specific – closed up, apart, holding himself in so that he wouldn’t explode. But Miranda just walked right up to Jax and started speaking to him. Brenda was too far away to hear what she was saying, but she could see that Miranda wasn’t about to go away any time soon.

She held her breath as she watched the silent scene. Brenda was secretly relieved when Miranda seemed to say something that upset Jax. But then, she watched in horror as he seemed frozen in place. She felt the bile rise in her throat as Miranda ran her hands up Jax’s chest, and then when she raised on tiptoes to kiss him, she actually thought she was going to be sick on the beach. She kept praying that Jax would push her away – that he would remember the kisses they had shared the night he got back from Washington. But her nausea only grew when she saw Jax’s arms creep around Miranda’s waist. When Brenda saw him pull Miranda into a clinch, she turned and ran blindly in the other direction down the beach.

Brenda didn’t know how long she ran. She only knew that she had to get as far away from Jax and Miranda as she could. When she stopped, she found herself on an abandoned stretch of beach. There were no houses around, and best of all – no people. She sank to her knees and let the sobs that had been threatening to spill out have free reign.

She must have cried for about ten minutes. When Brenda raised her head and wiped her eyes, the sun had just about set. Clouds painted in brilliant shades of red and orange floated at the horizon. She rose to her feet and kicked off her shoes in the sand, drawn by some un-named force towards the ocean. The gentle waves lapped at her bare legs as she waded into the shallow water, being careful to avoid some coral and large pools of broken sea shells. She even bent down a few times to dangle her hands in the water. It felt so cool and refreshing that she splashed a little of it on her burning eyes.

The cry of a gull over her head finally forced Brenda to look up and take stock of her position. She had been so busy thinking about everything – Jon, Jax, her future with both or lack thereof – that she had waded about 100 feet from shore. The rising tide had completely covered the spot in the sand where she had sat and cried. She gave a half-laugh as she realized that her shoes were probably far out to sea by now, picked up and carried away by the waves.

The water was so shallow where she stood, though, that Brenda didn’t fear for her safety. She sighed and turned back to face the endless expanse of ocean. Maybe this was the best place to find God and have another talk with Her. {How can You expect me to find his heart and heal it? When will "her" past ever stop haunting "my" present?}

"BRENDA!!" The sound of Jax’s shout almost caused Brenda to lose her balance. She turned around and saw him standing at the water’s edge, his hands cupped to his mouth as he shouted her name again. "BRENDA! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!"

Hot tears threatened to run down her face again, but Brenda was determined that Jax wouldn’t see her cry or grovel. "GO AWAY!!"

She could see Jax’s frustration as he ran both hands through his hair. "COME BACK TO SHORE NOW, BRENDA! YOU’RE GOING TO GET YOURSELF HURT OUT THERE!"

Brenda turned to face him and put both hands on her hips defiantly. "THE WATER’S SHALLOW AND I WANT TO BE ALONE! I’LL BE FINE, JAX – NOW LEAVE ME ALONE!!!"

She heard him swear sharply and gasped aloud as he kicked his shoes off in the sand and waded into the water towards her. "YOU LITTLE FOOL! THERE’S CORAL AND SHARP SHELLS ON THIS PART OF THE BEACH!"

Jax was moving towards her so swiftly but cautiously as he picked his way around the reefs and shells. "I saw the coral when I came out here, Jax!" She didn’t have to shout since he was only about 25 feet from her now. "I can find my way back again fine!"

"You can’t bloody well find your way back in the dark, Brenda! And if you take one wrong step, you’ll cut your feet to ribbons!" He stopped and pointed towards the horizon. "Or hadn’t you noticed that the sun set since you came out here?" The danger of her situation came home to Brenda as she moved a bare foot and felt a sharp sting on her instep. Jax’s face paled and he put out both hands towards her. "DON’T MOVE, ALRIGHT?" She nodded and chewed on her lower lip, suddenly shivering in the brisk breeze that had come up. "I’ve been walking these beaches since I was a kid, and I know where the coral is."

Brenda did as instructed and within a few seconds, Jax was at her side. He hadn’t even bothered to roll up the bottoms of his blue jeans, and the blue chambray shirt he had worn to the celebration at La Veranda was soaked with his perspiration and the spray coming off the waves. Jax effortlessly swept her up into his arms, clutching her against his chest an extra time for good measure. "I’ve got you, now," he murmured. "Now just hold on and I’ll have you back on the shore in a few minutes."

She nodded silently and wound her arms around Jax’s neck. Brenda could feel Jax’s heart pounding against the side of her arm, but she wasn’t sure if it was the exertion of carrying her, the terror he had felt seeing her out in the water alone, or just leftover excitement from his passionate play with Miranda minutes before. Jax managed to negotiate his way back to the sand and when they were out of the water, he set her down gently.

"Thanks." Brenda pushed the damp hair back out of her eyes but was suspiciously quiet. "I didn’t realize there was so much dangerous coral around here."

Jax stared back down the beach towards the house. "There’s not too much around the stretch of beach by our house, but it gets really bad down here." He pointed off into the distance. "That’s why I usually don’t come this far when I’m swimming or running, especially after dark."

"But……it’s not bad right here?" Brenda motioned towards the wet sand where the waves were leaving their imprints.

Jax stared down at the sand curiously. "No. Why do you ask?"

Brenda shrugged and tipped her head to the side. "Because……I wouldn’t want you to get hurt…..when I do ……THIS!!" Before Jax could react to her words, Brenda put her flat hands against his shoulders, pushed with all her might, and knocked him flat on his denim-clad butt in the surf.

Jax threw his hands back to support himself and came up sputtering. "What!…….. He shook his head and spray from his wet hair misted Brenda. "What the bloody h*ll was that for?"

"Because you’re a low-down, sneaky, son of a b*tch, that’s why!" Brenda shouted, her hands on her hips.

"I just save you from turning your feet into mincemeat, and I’M a low-down son of a b*tch??!!"

Brenda leaned over towards him. "You forgot sneaky, @sshole!" Jax frowned in confusion, causing Brenda to laugh derisively. "Oh, don’t play innocent with me, mister! I saw you kissing her before!"

With her accusation hanging in the air between them, Brenda spun around and started striding back towards the house. Jax sprang to his feet and caught up with her before she got very far. He grabbed her by the arm and forced her to turn back to him. "Kissing??!!" He pushed the wet hair back off his face. "Kissing who?"

Brenda put her hands on her hips again and grimaced. "Miss America -- as if you didn’t know who you were kissing!" Jax sighed in frustration and Brenda pushed at his shoulders but didn’t manage to knock him down. "Our next-door sl*t! Miranda, Jax!" She started to walk away again but turned back with an afterthought. "Oh, and I’m sorry I’m not using your mother’s polite form of swearing, but after seeing you and her swapping spit like that down on the beach, I’ve gone WAY past polite!"

Brenda had put about ten feet between them when she heard Jax’s voice. "I was NOT kissing her!"

She froze and inhaled deeply before answering. "Well, let’s see," she started sarcastically. "Your lips were touching hers, your eyes were closed, she had those Roman hands and Russian fingers all over your body and you seemed to be returning the favor….." She turned to face him as she ticked off points on her fingers, and then crossed her arms triumphantly. "Yep…..now I admit I don’t know about Australian customs, but where *I* come from, that’s called kissing."

Jax closed the distance between them slowly. "There’s kissing and then there’s……*kissing*, Brenda."

"Oh, well thank you for enlightening me on that one, professor!" Brenda applauded and Jax looked like he wanted to wring her neck. "You’ll have to excuse me, but when I felt like I was going to puke all over the sand, I didn’t stick around to see whether your tongues did the tango or just played a friendly game of tag!"

Brenda gasped softly when Jax reached out and grabbed her by the upper arms. "D*mnit, Brenda, I wasn’t kissing her like that!" Up close, he could see the pain in her eyes, and for reasons he didn’t understand, it hurt him immensely. {What’s the matter with you, man? She made love to other men all the time and didn’t care if it ripped your guts out. Why should you care so much that’s she’s hurting? Why is it so important to you that she knows the truth about the kiss?}

Jax didn’t have answers for his questions. He only knew that he had to make Brenda understand since she obviously had left the scene before he turned down Miranda’s advances. Brenda finally managed to pull out of his grasp, and she backed away from him a few paces. "Jax, there’s really no point in discussing this," she said flatly. "I know what I saw, and now I should probably get back to the house in case Jon needs me….."

"Not before we set things straight." Jax reached out for her arm but she pulled it away just before he made contact.

Brenda kept marching back towards the house but raised one hand behind her, palm outwards. "Talk to the hand, Jax. I’m not……"

She didn’t realize that Jax could move that swiftly on the soft sand of the beach. Before she even finished the sentence, Jax captured her wrist, forcing her to turn around and face him. In one smooth move, he pulled her hard up against his body. "Obviously what’s needed here is a demonstration, Mrs. Jacks."

Brenda struggled a little but Jax only wrapped his arms around her to hold her closer. "Now when you saw Miranda and I kissing, it was a kiss like this." Before she could say a word, Jax lowered his lips to hers. They were passionless, and felt like cold, lifeless marble against hers. He relaxed his grip on her just enough so that she couldn’t escape. He only held the kiss for a few seconds before he raised his head to look into her shocked eyes.

"Now – what you probably *think* you saw was a kiss like this." Brenda saw the fire light in Jax’s eyes right before he lowered his lips to hers again. This time, his lips were soft and fluid as they caressed hers. He moved his head back and forth slightly, causing friction that she was surprised didn’t cause spontaneous combustion there on the spot. Brenda felt liquid heat course through her veins, making the soles of her feet burn and threatening to melt every bone in her body. Jax placed one thumb in the center of her chin and applied just enough pressure so that her jaw eased and her lips parted to allow his tongue entrance. When it rubbed against her tongue, Brenda moaned softly.

Far too soon for Brenda’s taste, Jax broke the kiss. She opened her eyes to see passion flaming in his. "Now – do you understand what I meant by different kinds of kissing?"

She swallowed hard. "I don’t know – I was pretty far up the beach. I could have sworn that it was the second kiss and not the first."

Jax sucked in a ragged breath. "That’s what I thought. I’d better go over the difference again, just to make sure there’s no doubt in your mind." He lowered his lips towards hers again. "This is what *really* happened." Brenda couldn’t believe that the same lips were touching hers. How could the male heat of his passion have nearly melted her just minutes before, and yet now his kiss was cold and withdrawn? It took all of her willpower not to beg for *this* kiss to end and the *other* kiss to begin.

She didn’t have to wait long. Jax pulled back after only a few seconds, sliding his hands up to cup her face. "But if I had really *wanted* her, I would have kissed her like this." A sigh of satisfaction escaped Brenda’s lips right before Jax kissed her again. This time, his tongue swept into her mouth immediately. Brenda felt his in-drawn breath when she boldly pushed it back and did some exploring of her own. But Jax, not to be out-done, drew little moaning noises from the back of Brenda’s throat when he slid one hand down from her jaw. She ached to tell him where she wanted him to touch, but he just kept kissing her until she felt his hand gently brush across her breast. Her shirt, which was damp from her adventure in the ocean, only enhanced the feeling, and she pressed her body against his fingers wantonly.

Jax pulled out of the kiss but didn’t move his hand as he looked into her eyes again. "Now – do you think you understand the difference?"

{You’re not the only one who can play this game, mister.} A coy smile spread across her face as she shrugged slightly. "I’m not sure – let me see if I’ve got this right." She raised up on tiptoes as she slid her hands into the hair at the nape of his neck. "Now, this is the way you *really* kissed her." It was Jax’s turn to wish time would speed up as Brenda’s lips became cold and passive. The fish swimming in the ocean were warmer than she was.

He silently gave thanks when she ended the kiss. "But I *thought* that *this* was the way you were kissing her." Brenda became the aggressor as she would her legs around Jax’s waist and kissed him for all she was worth. Soft moans and sighs of desire floated out with the receding tide. When Brenda rubbed the part of her body that was aching for Jax’s touch against the proof of his desire, he seriously considered lowering her to the sand and making love to her that minute.

But too much had happened that night, and when Brenda pulled away and looked into Jax’s eyes, they both realized it. They both needed time to get past the hurts and revelations of the night. Brenda un-wound her legs and Jax gently lowered her back to the sandy beach. "So – did I get it right that time?"

Jax nodded shakily. "Yeah – right. You got it right."

Brenda mimicked his nod. "Good. I don’t want any more misunderstandings between us."

Another nod as Jax stuck his hands in his pockets awkwardly. "No. No more misunderstandings. Good."

Brenda turned slowly and started walking back towards the house. Jax fell into place beside her and a few minutes later, he awkwardly raised his arm. After letting it float in mid-air for a few paces, it came down to rest on Brenda’s shoulder. She stopped, looked up at him, smiled, and then nestled closer to his side as he tightened his grip on her opposite shoulder. They walked the rest of the way back to the house in companionable silence.

None of that escaped the eyes of their silent observer. His binoculars gave him an up-close view of Jax and Brenda’s kisses. And that didn’t please him – at all.

To be continued…..

Music credit: "Frozen," written by Madonna and Patrick Leonard, from the CD, "Ray of Light"