Special thanks to Wynne for her help with locations for this chapter.

Jax took a breath to try to answer his son, but before he could, Ellie appeared in the doorway with her brother. She punched him in the arm, very much annoyed at her older sibling’s obtuse observation. "Randall, can’t you see? Father doesn’t have his hand on Miss Barrett’s behind – he has his hand on the *patch* on Miss Barrett’s behind."

Randall raised his eyebrows in enlightenment while Jax sputtered, trying desperately to preserve Brenda’s dignity. But it was a lost cause. "Ohhhh, you’re absolutely right, Hunter." They both nodded as Brenda shot Jax a withering glare. Then Randall frowned in ignorance again. "But why would he have his hand on the *patch* on Miss Barrett’s behind?’

Hunter folded her arms in a "must-I-tell-you-everything?" pose. "He has his hand on the patch because he’s trying to cover it up, aren’t you father?" She turned ingenuous eyes to Jax, who stammered a little more and gave Brenda a sheepish look.

RJ rescued his father again. "Ohhhh, you’re probably right, Hunter. Father wants to cover up Miss Barrett’s patch because he’s embarrassed by it." He gave his father a condescending look. "But you really shouldn’t let it embarrass you, father."

Jax was pale. "Let *what* embarrass me, RJ?"

"The fact that Miss Barrett is so poor, she has to wear clothing with patches on it."

Hunter nodded enthusiastically. "Yes, father. We really don’t mind if Miss Barrett’s poor. We’ve never met a *poor* person before." As Brenda inhaled with a hissing sound, Hunter pushed a little harder. "Are you *poor*, Miss Barrett?"

Brenda gave them an acid smile, but only Jax caught the hidden meaning. "No, Ellie, I’m *not* poor." She gestured towards her dining room table. "In fact, I’d be *happy* to discuss my international investments with you, but I can guarantee I’d be much more coherent if I did it on a full stomach!"

RJ and Ellie paused, but then nodded quickly and adjourned to the dining room. Jax came to take Brenda in his arms, but she pulled away with a soft yelp. "Jax! Are those kids or machines?"

"I know, I know, sweetie." He put his hands on his hips, shaking his head. "I didn’t realize what Miranda had turned them into until last night over dinner." Brenda nodded towards the large bowl of strawberries and juice, which Jax picked up to carry into the dining room as she carried the bagels and yogurt.

Brenda spread the food out on the table and after everyone had helped themselves, she settled into her chair with a long sigh. "Soooo.....how long have you two kids been in LA?"

RJ glanced at his father before answering. "We just arrived yesterday afternoon with our mother. Mother ordered dinner for us from an excellent eaterie, and then father joined us after he finished his shift at the hospital."

Brenda nodded. {That’s why Jax couldn’t come to the poker game last night. She blind-sided him with the kids at the last minute.} As difficult as they were to take in large doses, Brenda almost felt sorry for RJ and Ellie. Even though Veronica and Harlan hadn’t been June and Ward Cleaver, they certainly hadn’t stifled Brenda’s zest for life the way Miranda did.

Brenda was about to suggest some local tourist attractions when the phone rang. She gave Jax a wry look. "The way my morning is going, that’s probably my broker telling me that the market crashed ten minutes ago." She rose from her chair, wiping her mouth with her napkin. "I’ll be back in a flash." She leaned down to give Jax a quick kiss on the lips and then rushed through the swinging door into the kitchen.

Brenda had barely cleared the door when Ellie broke the silence. "Is she your girlfriend, fath....." Jax glared at her briefly, causing Ellie to think twice. ".......dad?"

{D*mn. Why can’t they just make a textbook about "How to be a divorced parent with a social life and explain it to your kids"?} Jax drew a deep breath to answer when Randall took a turn.

"Yes, dad. Are you and Brenda having intercourse?"

Brenda was just coming back through the swinging door when Jax choked on his yogurt. She came up behind him and slapped him vigorously on the back until Jax waved his hand at her. "Are you OK, Jax?" He nodded, red-faced, and reached for a glass of juice. Brenda smiled at the children as she took her seat and reached for another strawberry. "So .... did I miss anything important while I was on the phone?"

Jax swallowed hard, jumping into the conversation before his nosey children could find out how "close" they really were. "No!" He gave RJ and Ellie a look that could kill and then turned back to Brenda with a smile. "So, who was that on the phone?"

"Lucy." Brenda frowned as she reached for another bagel. "She’s mad because I didn’t get the outline for my next 5 chapters to her yet." She stopped spreading cream cheese on her bagel, shaking the knife at Jax while he watched wide-eyed. "I mean -- that’s GREAT that Lea sent her the outline for another book." She looked back down at the bagel, spreading again with a vengeance. "Lea can write eight different books at the same time and keep all the plots and characters straight. Bully for her," she murmured in an acid tone. Brenda set the knife down and bit into the bagel, taking out her resentment on the doughy pastry.

Finally RJ broke the silence. "Who’s Lucy?"

"Lucy’s my boss." Brenda set down the bagel and took a long drink of orange juice.

"You mean she’s your mother." Ellie’s comment was a statement -- not a question.

Brenda finally laughed. "No -- although there are times when I *feel* like she is!" She took another sip of juice. "Lucy is my publisher -- I write books and she’s the head of the company that publishes them."

Jax buried his head in his hands as RJ put his bagel down deliberately. "You mean, you write books and get *paid* for it?"

"If I’m doing it right, I do!" Brenda smiled.

"What kind of books?" Jax slipped down a little further in his chair as RJ voiced the question.

"Romance novels," Brenda answered. "Mostly historical romances -- some of my friends write the contemporary style, but personally I’ve always preferred knights and pirates and that kind of stuff."

"Mother wouldn’t approve." Ellie was emphatic.

"Really?" Jax could hear the challenge in Brenda’s voice and he sat up straighter, waiting for World War III to start. "Why not?"

"Mother says that a woman’s place is making a healthy and happy home for her husband and children. She says that the only reason women need to go out and work is because they were daft enough to marry men who were failures at providing for them."

"Really??!!" Brenda folded her hands in front of her chin, resting her elbows on the table. She gave Jax a saccharine-sweet smile. "And just what *else* does dear mother say?"

"She says that only women of loose morals wear their blue jeans so tightly that they rip and require patches." Brenda almost shot out of the chair when RJ echoed his mother’s sentiments, but Jax put his hand on Brenda’s arm to restrain her with a smile.

"SOOOOO.....I think I’m about ready for a great morning of sailing!" He looked at the three shocked faces around the table. "How about you?"

"Sailing?" Brenda looked back and forth between the children and Jax. "You mean you still want to go sailing this morning?"

"Sure. I thought we could all go together." He leaned back in the chair. "RJ and Ellie have been listening to me go on and on about it for years, so I thought they could find out how wonderful it was today!"

"But, Jax....." Brenda gestured weakly at RJ and Ellie, who sat silently. "......they’re ......well....." She placed her hands flat on the table, leaning closer to Jax. "They’re dressed like they’re going to a backgammon tournament, not going sailing!"

Jax’s face fell. "Oh, yeah......I guess you’re right." Suddenly, he got a sly smile on his face. He reached into his back pocket and pulled out his wallet. "But I think that with your expert advice and the help of my gold card, we can remedy that in a hurry!"

Brenda gave Jax a conspiratorial smile and rose from the table quickly. She cleared the remnants of breakfast in record time and met Jax and the children at the door just in time to hear RJ’s protest. "But father, where are we going? And why do we need different clothing?"

Brenda turned him to face her. "We’re going sailing, RJ, and we can’t do that in those fancy, formal clothes you’ve got on. So we’re going to make a quick stop first."

"Where?" Ellie looked as though she was expecting to be led to the gas chamber.

Brenda smiled, sighed, rolled her eyes heavenward, and clasped her hands to her chest. "To my home away from home -- the Santa Monica Mall."

RJ swallowed hard. "We’re going.....to ........a mall?"

Jax took over the conversation as Brenda locked her door behind them. "Yes, RJ. You know -- tons of little stores, junk food vendors, huge crowds, bloody awful parking......We had them in Boston, I’m sure." Jax held his hand out towards his SUV as Brenda took Ellie’s hand merrily.

Ellie looked alternately between her father and Brenda as though they had lost their minds. "But mother says that only hormonal adolescents and housewives who lack the power to think independently shop at malls. She *definitely* wouldn’t approve."

Brenda got into the passenger side of the front seat with a naughty smile. "That’s EXACTLY why we’re going there, Ellie!"

**********************

Jax staggered into his kitchen at 11AM the next morning to face a grim-faced Miranda. His hair was sticking out in all directions and his striped cotton pajama bottoms rode low on his hips. When he scratched his bare left shoulder and yawned loudly, Miranda shook her head and folded her arms in front of her. She didn’t say a word as he slid into a chair, rubbing his eyes. Instead, she got up, went to take a pot of coffee off the stove, poured him a cup, and then after returning the pot to the stove, she sat back down in her chair. Jax took a sip of the coffee but set it down quickly. "Bloody h*ll! You *still* don’t know how to make a decent pot of coffee!"

Miranda folded her hands smugly on the kitchen table. "And a pleasant good morning to you too, Jax!"

Jax sighed as he took another cautious sip of coffee. "Look, Miranda, last night wasn’t one of the cheerier evenings I’ve spent in the ER, OK?" He rose from the table with a groan and went to the refrigerator. "Everything was quiet for about an hour, but then we had three teenagers who barely survived a gang shootout, a mugging victim, and then around midnight, an eight-car pileup on the highway followed by two kids who decided it was the night to have their first experience with LSD." He opened the refrigerator door, grabbed a carton of yogurt and a small bottle of orange juice, and then slammed it shut again. "I was only supposed to work until 2AM but didn’t get home until almost four, if you bothered to notice."

Miranda’s hands were still folded on the table in front of her. "Well, Jax, you know how often I used to tell you that working in the ER wouldn’t be pleasant. I mean, I’m not saying I told you so, but if you had specialized in dermatology instead, you could have kept normal hours and……"

"OK!!!" Jax shouted but then winced and frowned. He propped his elbows on the kitchen table and buried his face in his hands. After a few minutes of silence, he looked around the kitchen and then at Miranda. "Where are the kids? Still sleeping?"

"No. They’re in the bedroom watching movies. We had a quiet dinner last night after you brought them home and then went to a video rental store." She sighed blissfully. "They were thrilled when I got the only copy of "Seven Brides for Seven Brothers." A person just can *never* get enough of Jane Powell and Howard Keel, you know."

Jax snorted and put his head down again. "Sounds thrilling."

Miranda squirmed in her chair. "The children certainly were exhausted when you brought them home yesterday." Jax looked up at her vacantly. "They said you took them sailing."

{We went sailing, but you’re obviously on a *fishing* expedition.} "That’s right." He took another sip of coffee. "That’s why we had to stop first and get them some different clothes – so they wouldn’t ruin their good ones."

She pursed her lips and reached for a paper napkin as Jax dribbled a little yogurt. She tried to wipe at his chin, but he pulled away immediately. "Well, I’m glad they didn’t wear their good things. That salt water did awful things to the color of those blue jeans after just one wearing."

Jax shook his head and smiled. "They’re stone-washed, Miranda. They’re *supposed* to be that color."

She lifted her chin a notch in begrudged understanding and then toyed with the handle of her coffee cup. "They certainly had a good time. That’s all they could talk about at dinner, in fact." She didn’t lift her eyes to Jax. "Who’s Brenda, by the way?"

{NOW we’re getting somewhere.} "A friend."

"A friend." Jax nodded as he continued to eat his yogurt, deliberately ignoring her obvious curiosity. "A friend, as in a fellow medical professional? Like that nurse person, Jane?"

Jax frowned. "Jane?"

"Yes, Jane." Miranda pointed over her shoulder at the phone. "She called here yesterday, by the way -- with the names of some books you were looking for." As Jax realized who Miranda was talking about, she went on. "I think she said she assists the doctor who puts the people to sleep in the operating room."

"It’s JEAN, Miranda, and she’s not a nurse," Jax replied acidly. "She’s a full-fledged physician herself -- an anesthesiologist." Miranda shrugged her shoulders in a "so what" gesture, but Jax wasn’t about to let her off the hook that easily. "Anyway -- to answer your original question -- NO, Brenda isn’t one of my colleagues. A mutual friend introduced us."

Miranda’s eyebrows rose. "Soooo....you’re dating then?"

Jax slammed his hands down on the table, causing Miranda to jump. "What’s with the twenty questions, Miranda? We’re divorced. I have a right to have a social life again."

"I’m *more* than aware of that, Jax." Miranda took the napkin and dabbed delicately at her eyes, which caused Jax to sigh loudly in frustration. Then she broke into a smile. "In fact, you’ll never guess who I got a call from the other day……Bonnie Falswaith-Newton-Cummings!" Jax frowned. "You remember her, don’t you? She and I went to college together -- she hosted one of my baby showers."

Jax’s face was a blank. "Nope. Not a clue."

"Well, she and I lost touch for a while, but then after she got my note last year at Christmas about our.....falling out....." She dabbed theatrically at her eyes again. "......well, Bonnie dropped me a note to tell me she had moved to California! From what I understand, she lives not far from here!" Her voice dropped a few notches. "She never got married, you know."

Jax’s eyes narrowed and he leaned forward. "Miranda -- you wouldn’t be planning on matchmaking for me, would you?"

Miranda gave him her most wide-eyed, innocent smile. "Why no, Jax! Whatever gives you that idea?"

"Good." Jax rose and went to the refrigerator to get himself another small bottle of orange juice. "Because this Bonnie person has far too many names for me to remember, and I think I’m doing just fine on my own, thank you very much."

Jax stood at the refrigerator drinking his juice as Miranda still sat at the table, feigning an wounded look. "I was only trying to help, Jax. After all, if you did intend to get serious about another woman, she shouldn’t be some floozy that you met on the Sundown Strip or something......"

Jax choked on his juice and came up laughing. "It’s the *Sunset* Strip, Miranda, and I can assure you I didn’t meet Brenda there." Then he sauntered back to the table and leaned down next to her with a wicked smile. "You wouldn’t happen to be jealous, would you?"

Miranda’s jaw dropped. "Of course not!!" She began playing with the handle of her coffee cup again. "It was just healthy curiosity, that’s all." She raised her eyes to meet Jax’s. "I mean, don’t you want to know anything about Herbert?"

"Herbert?" Jax’s voice came out as a squeak as he sat down.

"Yes, Herbert." Miranda smiled and rose to take her coffee cup to the sink. "The man I’m spending the holidays with in Hawaii. Air Force Lieutenant Colonel Herbert Wellington III -- retired."

"Lieutenant Colonel?" Jax nodded, his mouth a grim line. "I’m impressed, Miranda." Then he shook his head sadly. "Although if he’s already retired, he must be an old fart."

Miranda whirled around with her hands on her hips. "He’s *not* old, Jax." When Jax started giggling, Miranda realized he had only said it to aggravate her. She folded her arms. "Herbert is kind, and sensitive, and erudite -- we met at a Proust seminar at the junior college."

"Hmmmm.....a real animal between the sheets, I’ll bet."

Miranda sat back down, a superior smile on her face. "Unlike you, Jax, Herbert is interested in ALL of me, not just my body."

Jax was about to make a crude comeback when he heard the sound of little feet coming down the hallway. He held up a hand to silence Miranda and two seconds later, RJ and Ellie appeared. "Father! You’re home!" Ellie ran to hug her father tightly around the neck while RJ hung back behind her. It was obvious he wanted to hug Jax also, but when he saw Miranda sitting at the table, he was torn.

Jax almost got tears in his eyes at his daughter’s enthusiastic hug. He returned it and then pulled away from Ellie’s embrace to look at her. "Soooo....I see you survived your first experience on the "Cutting Edge" without any ill effects." He couldn’t help but notice that she was dressed the way her mother had probably ordered -- a white cotton blouse with a plaid kilt skirt -- but in place of her brown leather Buster Browns, Ellie was wearing the pink docksiders that Brenda had picked out the day before.

"Mother said you had a long night at the hospital." RJ decided it was time for him to make his presence known. "We tried to wait up, but mother said you wouldn’t be home until late so we went to sleep."

Jax smiled and patted his son on the shoulder. "That’s OK, RJ. I had to work later than I expected, and I understand that all of that fresh air yesterday probably made you sleepy." He was gratified to see that RJ was coming around, too -- he wore the same "Santa Monica" T-shirt that they had picked together at Gap Kids. But in a concession to his mother, he still wore proper chino trousers.

"Are we going sailing again today, father?" Ellie’s enthusiasm for the sport warmed her father’s heart. Jax still held her in his loose embrace and he stroked her hair lovingly.

"No, sweetie, I have to go back to the hospital in a few hours. I promised one of my colleagues I would scrub in on a tricky surgery." He could see the disappointment in RJ and Ellie’s faces. "Besides," he continued, giving Ellie a reassuring squeeze, "your mother will be leaving for Hawaii tomorrow morning and I thought you might want to spend time with her today. We’ll have lots of time together during the next two weeks."

Ellie turned to her brother and they sighed in unison. "Now, children," Miranda crooned, "we can have just as much fun today as you had yesterday when you went sailing." She rose from the table to get some papers next to the phone. "I already made a few calls, and I found out there’s a wonderful exhibit of Cezanne at the Art Museum."

"Wow." RJ was less than enthusiastic. He looked at Jax. "So what are we doing for Christmas, da.......father?"

Jax couldn’t help but notice Miranda’s interest in their plans for the holiday. "Well, we’ve actually been invited to dinner Christmas Eve at a colleague’s house." He bowed slightly towards Miranda. "Dr. Ned Ashton is the head of Radiology, and he’s invited us to come over for the evening."

Miranda smiled cattily. "Well, I’m sure they’ll be delighted that *our* children will be able to converse intelligently with your peers, Jax."

Jax waved his hand, shaking his head. "Oh, no.....quite the contrary. The Ashton’s are new parents. With a two month old baby around, I’m sure they won’t be expecting RJ or Ellie to explain the theory of relativity. I understand that Ned and Lois host this kind of open house every year at the holidays."

Miranda nodded. "And for Christmas Day?"

Jax tried to look nonchalant. "We’ll be spending Christmas Day at Brenda’s house." He swallowed hard and prayed for a last minute Christmas miracle. "I believe Brenda has planned to cook Christmas dinner for us."

Miranda immediately picked up on Jax’s concern. She rose and went to the kitchen doorway, but before she left, she turned around and cooed, "Christmas dinner at Brenda’s? Oooo, goodie – maybe she’ll splurge and order both Original Recipe AND Extra Crispy from the Colonel!!"

***************************

"That’s EXCELLENT!" Harlan Barrett continued to read his Forbes Magazine as Veronica sat at her desk, taking furious notes and speaking into the telephone. "And you can deliver that on Christmas Day?"

Harlan didn’t even look up from his magazine. "I don’t see why we can’t just send Tooshie the same basket of fruit we always do -- with the shares of stock mixed in for a surprise."

Veronica waved her hand at him, and smiled into the telephone. "That all sounds wonderful, Chef Marc." She tapped her chin with a pen and frowned. "But I’m really not sure that Yorkshire Pudding is the way to go for dessert." She listened for a few minutes and then broke into a huge smile. "Oh, that’s *much* better! Chocolate mousse with shaved peppermint sprinkles sounds heavenly! And I don’t think there’s a child alive who doesn’t like chocolate!"

Harlan continued to shake his head until Veronica hung up the telephone. "I know I’m gonna hate myself for asking, Cupcake, but would you care to tell me what the sam hill’s goin’ on?"

Veronica rose from her desk and came to sit on the arm of Harlan’s favorite reading chair. "Now, Harlan, you spoke to Tooshie when she called yesterday! Don’t you remember how she mentioned that Dr. Jacks’ children are visiting for the Christmas holidays?"

Harlan frowned but then his brow lifted. "Ahhh…..Doctor Jacks. The nice young man who took care of her when she got hit by that stoned mini-bike driver."

Veronica sighed. "Yes – young, blonde, tall, handsome, sensitive Dr. Jacks." She smiled at some indeterminate spot on the ceiling, remembering how his surgical scrubs brought out the blue in his eyes.

Harlan poked his reminiscing wife. "You forgot to mention two things about him – rich, and divorced."

Veronica swatted Harlan playfully. "Yes, well anyway Dr. Jacks and his two children are coming to Brenda’s house for Christmas dinner. Apparently his ex-wife dumped them into Jax’s lap at the last minute. And our Brenda volunteered to cook."

Harlan sighed. "Ohhhh, Lord……Tooshie trying to cook. That means beanie weenies and those awful chocolate and marshmallow things she makes over an open fire." He shook his head and scrunched up his nose in disgust. "Her entire culinary repertoire is courtesy of the Girl Scouts of America."

"You *do* know your daughter, Poopsie." She rose from the chair with determination and went to the desk where she picked up a pad and pen again. "Which is exactly why I called Chef Marc at Ivy at the Shore. They’re going to deliver a complete Christmas dinner with all the trimmings to Brenda’s house."

Harlan swallowed hard. "A complete Christmas dinner? From Ivy at the Shore?" His face started to turn a bright shade of red. "Cupcake – do you know how much that’s going to cost us?"

"Oh, Harlan, don’t be such a Scrooge." She came to drape her arms around his neck gracefully. "It’s Christmas, and I really think our Tooshie cares about this man. And if something *is* developing between them, it’s important for her to make a good impression on his children." She tweaked his nose and grinned. "They’re part of him, just like all of your annoying, endearing, nasty little habits are a part of you."

Harlan gave a grumpy sigh. "Well, I suppose if he makes our little Tooshie happy, it’s worth the cost." His eyes brightened. "So do we get to drop in and sample what all of our hard-earned money is buying her for Christmas?"

Veronica pulled away and went back to the desk. "No. I think it’s important we leave them alone at this point. Brenda is probably still learning how to deal with those children, and we don’t want to scare them off too soon." She picked up several travel brochures. "I thought maybe we could go someplace warm for the holidays, and then just drop in to check on Tooshie on our way back after the New Year’s."

Harlan came to look over Veronica’s shoulder at the brochures. "Warm, huh?" He picked up one. "Sounds good to me. You know how I hate to think of snow and ice – and how much it costs to have the driveway shoveled." He held it at arm’s length and squinted at it. "This resort in Cancun sounds nice – we haven’t been there in years."

Veronica frowned. "I know, and they have some wonderful package deals, which I know would appeal to your frugal sensibilities. But they’re already booked up." A smile tugged at the corners of her lips and she held up a brochure to Harlan. "I thought maybe we might try this instead."

Harlan read the glossy advertisement for a few minutes, but then started smiling in spite of himself. "Hmmm…..tanned native women in skimpy bikinis, great food, sun and sand all day – sounds good to me, Cupcake." He leaned down and kissed her on the cheek. "I’ll go start packing." He walked to the door of the room and then turned back to give her a naughty wink. "Hawaii – here we come!!!"

To be continued…..